1
00:00:02,544 --> 00:00:05,755
[ KNOCKS ON DOOR ]
> Hank: WELCOME, WEARY
2
00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:10,427
TRAVELER, TO CASTLE DRACULA!
3
00:00:10,510 --> 00:00:11,803
THE MASTER IS RESTING NOW.
4
00:00:11,886 --> 00:00:13,471
WOULD YOU LIKE A DRINK OF BLOOD?
5
00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:15,014
>> Dr. Venture: WHAT IS THIS?
6
00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:16,141
>> Hank: BLOOD!
7
00:00:16,224 --> 00:00:18,226
>> Dr. Venture: [ SNIFFING ]
TOMATO...BLOOD?
8
00:00:18,309 --> 00:00:21,146
>> Hank: KETCHUP AND PEPSI
BLOOD.
9
00:00:21,229 --> 00:00:22,605
>> Dr. Venture: HMM.
10
00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:25,191
>> Hank: THE MASTER AWAKES, AND
HE MUST FEED!
11
00:00:25,275 --> 00:00:28,737
>> Dean: I AM THE MONSTER THAT
BREATHING MEN WOULD KILL!
12
00:00:28,820 --> 00:00:31,281
[ Transylvanian accent ] I AM
DRACULA!
13
00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:32,073
BLAH.
14
00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:33,241
>> Dr. Venture: ALL RIGHT.
15
00:00:33,324 --> 00:00:34,576
WELL, THANK YOU, BOYS.
16
00:00:34,659 --> 00:00:37,620
THAT WAS, UH...CHILLING.
17
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:42,500
>> Hank: HERE IT IS, THE TOMB OF
THE MUMMY.
18
00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:43,918
BUT BE CAREFUL.
19
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:48,089
THE PATH BEFORE US IS DANGEROUS
AND MAY EVEN BE FILLED WITH
20
00:00:48,173 --> 00:00:48,798
MUMMIES!
21
00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,383
>> Dr. Venture: WHAT?
22
00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:51,634
THIS IS MY SOCK!
23
00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:53,136
WHAT? GIMME THAT.
24
00:00:53,219 --> 00:00:54,345
>> Dean: OOOOH.
25
00:00:54,429 --> 00:00:56,681
MUMMY SEEKS VENGEANCE.
26
00:00:56,765 --> 00:01:00,101
[ GRUNTS ]
MUMMY...MUST KILL!
27
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:00,810
AH!
28
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:04,856
PFFT. HA!
29
00:01:04,939 --> 00:01:09,319
[ CLATTER ]
>> Dr. Venture: WHAT IS GOING ON
30
00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:10,153
UP HERE?!
31
00:01:10,236 --> 00:01:14,657
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
UGH.
32
00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:17,202
BROCK, GET A BUCKET OF COLD
WATER WITH AMMONIA AND DEAL
33
00:01:17,285 --> 00:01:18,036
WITH THIS.
34
00:01:18,119 --> 00:01:19,204
THEN MEET ME IN THE TANK ROOM.
35
00:01:19,287 --> 00:01:23,249
I GOT TO HEAT UP THE SLUGS!
36
00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:25,001
>> Hank: WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT?
37
00:01:25,084 --> 00:01:30,173
>> Dean: HE IS IMPOSSIBLE TO
SCARE!
38
00:01:30,256 --> 00:01:33,510
[ MOUSE CLICKING ]
>> Dr. Venture: WORKING ON THE
39
00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:34,302
HAUNTED BEDROOM?
40
00:01:34,385 --> 00:01:35,678
>> Hank: EH, THAT'S BABY STUFF.
41
00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:37,096
WE'RE GOING OUT TONIGHT.
42
00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:39,849
OH, UH, AS LONG AS YOU'RE HERE,
I GOT AN E-MAIL OF YOURS BY
43
00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,936
MISTAKE, SOMETHING ABOUT THAT
LUMP YOU KEEP TALKING ABOUT?
44
00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:43,978
>> Dr. Venture: WHAT?!
45
00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:44,813
LET ME SEE THAT!
46
00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:46,064
>> Hank: WHAT'S A MALIGNANT...
47
00:01:46,147 --> 00:01:46,606
MELANOMA?
48
00:01:46,689 --> 00:01:47,357
>> Dean: AH!
49
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:48,733
OH, IT STINGS WHEN I PEE!
50
00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:50,318
I KNEW I SHOULDN'T HAVE TRUSTED
HER!
51
00:01:50,401 --> 00:01:53,071
>> Dr. Venture: DEAN, YOU GET
OUT HERE THIS INSTANT!
52
00:01:53,154 --> 00:01:55,490
>> EH, DOC, THERE'S A TON OF
WATER DRIPPING FROM THE LIGHT
53
00:01:55,573 --> 00:01:56,866
SOCKET IN THE KITCHEN.
54
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:59,744
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU FIXED
THE PLUMBING IN THIS PLACE?!
55
00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:01,204
>> Dr. Venture: OH, COME ON!
56
00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:01,996
YOU'RE KIDDING!
57
00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:03,998
>> Dean: BOO! GOTCHA!
58
00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:06,501
>> Dr. Venture: SO, THIS WAS ALL
JUST --
59
00:02:06,584 --> 00:02:07,544
>> Hank: FINALLY!
60
00:02:07,627 --> 00:02:09,712
>> HAPPY HALLOWEEN, DOC.
61
00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:19,722
[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ CREATURES GROWL, WOLF HOWLS ]
62
00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:25,019
[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ CREATURES GROWL, WOLF HOWLS ]
63
00:02:25,103 --> 00:02:27,146
[ WOLF HOWLS ]
64
00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:33,570
>> Dr. Orpheus: IT'S JUST A
65
00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,697
LITTLE GET-TOGETHER WITH THE
MAGICAL COMMUNITY.
66
00:02:35,780 --> 00:02:37,240
YOU WON'T HEAR A PEEP, I
PROMISE.
67
00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:40,243
>> Dr. Venture: FINE, BUT I WANT
EVERYBODY TO PARK THEIR CARS OR
68
00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:41,744
BROOMS OR WHATEVER OUTSIDE THE
GATE.
69
00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:41,870
NO LOUD MUSIC OR CHANTING OR
ANYTHING, EITHER.
70
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,747
NO LOUD MUSIC OR CHANTING OR
ANYTHING, EITHER.
71
00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:47,584
>> Dr. Orpheus: ON BEHALF OF THE
BRIMSTONE ASSEMBLY, I THANK YOU.
72
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:48,960
>> OH, HEY, ORPHEUS.
73
00:02:49,043 --> 00:02:52,130
I FIGURED YOU'D BE IN SWEATPANTS
AND A WIFE BEATER TONIGHT.
74
00:02:52,213 --> 00:02:54,507
>> Dr. Orpheus: THAT'S NOT
APPROPRIATE ATTIRE.
75
00:02:54,591 --> 00:02:57,385
WHAT WE WEAR ON THE OUTSIDE
SPEAKS FOR WHO WE ARE ON THE
76
00:02:57,468 --> 00:02:58,344
INSIDE.
77
00:02:58,428 --> 00:02:59,804
>> NO, I MEAN, LIKE FOR
HALLOWEEN.
78
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:02,515
>> Dr. Orpheus: OH, YES, AN
IRONIC OUTFIT, OF COURSE.
79
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:03,933
THAT WOULD BE JOLLY.
80
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:06,811
YOU KNOW, IN MY YOUTH I WAS --
>> Dr. Venture: DERMOTT, GO BACK
81
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:08,646
OUTSIDE AND RING THE DOORBELL.
82
00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:09,230
>> OH, HEY, MR. V.
83
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:10,523
WHERE'S HANK?
84
00:03:10,607 --> 00:03:13,026
>> Dr. Venture: GO BACK OUTSIDE
AND RING THE DOORBELL.
85
00:03:13,109 --> 00:03:14,277
>> WHAT, SERIOUSLY?
86
00:03:17,655 --> 00:03:19,616
>> Dr. Orpheus: YOU WERE VERY
HARD ON THAT BOY.
87
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:20,992
>> Dr. Venture: I HAVE MY
REASONS.
88
00:03:21,075 --> 00:03:23,912
HANK! DERMOTT'S AT THE DOOR!
89
00:03:23,995 --> 00:03:28,207
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
>> AH, YOUR DAD IS A DICK.
90
00:03:28,291 --> 00:03:30,043
HEY, WHY AREN'T YOU GUYS
DRESSED?
91
00:03:30,126 --> 00:03:32,795
>> Hank: I THOUGHT YOU SAID
COSTUMES ARE FOR LITTLE KIDS,
92
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,173
AND THEN YOU SHOW UP DRESSED
LIKE AN ENCHANTED MIME!
93
00:03:35,256 --> 00:03:36,090
>> I'M THE CROW!
94
00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:36,966
DRINK IT UP, HANK!
95
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:37,967
AND IT'S NOT A COSTUME.
96
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:39,302
IT'S A DISGUISE.
97
00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:41,554
IF THE COPS SEE US IN PLAIN
CLOTHES, WE'RE GONNA GET HAULED
98
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:42,639
IN.
99
00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:44,140
>> Hank: WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU
TELL ME?!
100
00:03:44,223 --> 00:03:44,974
ALL RIGHT.
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00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:46,059
THIS WILL ONLY TAKE A MOMENT.
102
00:03:46,142 --> 00:03:48,937
[ CHUCKLES ]
>> Dean: I'LL TAKE MY CHANCES
103
00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:49,979
WITH THE POLICE.
104
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,522
I THINK A STUPID SPEED SUIT IS
ENOUGH.
105
00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:52,690
CALL ME DANGEROUS.
106
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:53,274
>> HUH? LOSER-SAY-WHAT?
107
00:03:53,358 --> 00:03:54,067
>> Dean: WHAT?
108
00:03:54,150 --> 00:03:55,568
>> [ CHUCKLES ]
EXACTLY.
109
00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:56,319
>> Dean: WHAT?
110
00:03:56,402 --> 00:03:57,320
>> Hank: READY!
111
00:03:57,403 --> 00:03:59,155
>> WHAT IS THAT, A TRASH BAG?
112
00:03:59,238 --> 00:04:00,990
>> Hank: I'M A BAG OF HANK!
113
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,200
>> BAG OF STUPID.
114
00:04:02,283 --> 00:04:03,493
>> Hank: OR...
115
00:04:03,576 --> 00:04:05,662
CALIFORNIA RAISIN?
116
00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:11,125
>> I AM SO GLAD WE'RE HAVING A
PARTY!
117
00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:13,836
>> Dr. Orpheus: THIS IS NOT A
PARTY, AL.
118
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:17,674
WE ARE CHARGED WITH THE HONOR OF
HOSTING THE 331st MEETING OF THE
119
00:04:17,757 --> 00:04:19,008
BRIMSTONE ASSEMBLY!
120
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,343
>> UH-HUH. SURE.
121
00:04:20,426 --> 00:04:23,096
SO WHERE DO YOU WANT ME TO
ASSEMBLE THE CHIPS AND DIP?
122
00:04:23,179 --> 00:04:26,057
>> Dr. Orpheus: OH, BY MY MINI
FAJITAS, I THINK WOULD BE NICE.
123
00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:28,476
OR WITH THE CHEESES, SINCE THEY
ARE MORE OF AN APPETIZER.
124
00:04:28,559 --> 00:04:30,269
>> SO, THEN A STAR GOES IN THE
CIRCLE?
125
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:32,105
>> Dr. Orpheus: JEFFERSON, THIS
ISN'T "THE CRAFT."
126
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:35,566
>> WELL IF IT WAS, I'D BE
FAIRUZA BALK, AND YOU'D BE
127
00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:36,025
RACHEL TRUE.
128
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:37,110
>> WHICH ONE IS SHE?
129
00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:38,486
>> HMM, GUESS.
130
00:04:38,569 --> 00:04:40,947
>> Dr. Orpheus: WE ARE NOT
"THE CRAFT," AND WE DON'T PUT A
131
00:04:41,030 --> 00:04:42,281
STAR IN THE CENTER.
132
00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:45,118
WE HAVE A SQUARE REPRESENTING
PERFECTION INSIDE A CIRCLE
133
00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:47,620
REPRESENTING UNITY INSIDE A
TRIANGLE REPRESENTING
134
00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:48,955
SIMPLICITY.
135
00:04:49,038 --> 00:04:50,873
>> SIMPLICITY WOULD BE A STAR IN
THE MIDDLE.
136
00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:52,041
THIS RIGHT HERE'S CONFUSING.
137
00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:53,376
SOMEBODY ELSE DO THIS.
138
00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:55,336
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
139
00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:57,005
>> UGH, I'M BOILING IN HERE!
140
00:04:57,088 --> 00:04:58,881
WILL YOU JUST TAKE OFF YOUR
CLOAK?!
141
00:04:58,965 --> 00:04:59,882
>> TAKE OFF YOUR ATTITUDE!
142
00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:02,010
I HAVE TO KEEP MY RED POWER
MANTLE ON!
143
00:05:02,093 --> 00:05:04,220
[ DOOR OPENS ]
>> HEY, YOU GUYS ARE EARLY.
144
00:05:04,303 --> 00:05:06,472
SO JUST -- WHAT THE FUCK IS
THAT?
145
00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:08,016
SERIOUSLY.
146
00:05:08,099 --> 00:05:10,226
>> OH, SO IT'S OKAY WHEN YOU DO
IT, BUT WHEN I DO IT, I'M A
147
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:11,394
RACIST!
148
00:05:11,477 --> 00:05:13,730
>> WHAT THE --
>> WE'RE MERELY IN THE GUISE OF
149
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:14,897
THE TWO-HEADED MAN.
150
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:16,149
I'M MR. ROSEY GRIER.
151
00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:18,317
>> WELL, THAT'S KIND OF MY
FAULT.
152
00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:21,696
I TOLD HIM IT WAS A COSTUME
PARTY BECAUSE HE SIMPLY REFUSED
153
00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:24,240
TO ATTEND WHEN I TOLD HIM IT WAS
A MAGIC GATHERING.
154
00:05:24,323 --> 00:05:25,408
>> YES!
155
00:05:25,491 --> 00:05:28,202
I FIND THOSE TRADING-CARD GAMES
VERY CONFUSING.
156
00:05:28,870 --> 00:05:33,374
>> GENTLEMEN, GET READY FOR
PROJECT MAYHEM.
157
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:34,584
GOT EVERYTHING WE'LL NEED.
158
00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:36,252
SHAVING CREAM --
>> Hank: FINALLY!
159
00:05:36,335 --> 00:05:39,422
DEAN, AND I'M TRYING TO BE
SENSITIVE HERE, BUT IT'S ABOUT
160
00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:41,632
TIME WE WIPED THAT CHOCOLATE
MILK OFF YOUR FACE.
161
00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:43,885
YOU'RE PACKING A SAD TEEN-STACHE
THERE.
162
00:05:43,968 --> 00:05:44,844
>> NO, DILL HOLE.
163
00:05:44,927 --> 00:05:46,387
IT'S FOR SPRAYING ON CARS AND
STUFF!
164
00:05:46,929 --> 00:05:47,764
ROTTEN EGGS.
165
00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:50,141
YEAH, I BURIED THESE IN MY
BACKYARD FOR OVER A MONTH, AND
166
00:05:50,224 --> 00:05:52,769
THEY TOTALLY SMELL LIKE DEAD DOG
FART BY NOW.
167
00:05:52,852 --> 00:05:53,686
>> Dean: [ MUFFLED GAG ]
>> Hank: I'M IMPRESSED WITH YOUR
168
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:54,312
FORESIGHT.
169
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:58,775
>> AND I GOT A FULL MULTIPACK OF
ASS WIPE FOR TREES AND BUSHES.
170
00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:00,026
WHAT DID YOU GUYS BRING?
171
00:06:00,109 --> 00:06:00,818
>> Hank: DERMOTT.
172
00:06:00,902 --> 00:06:02,779
SWEET, SWEET, NAIVE DERMOTT.
173
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,948
I BROUGHT WITH ME THE ONLY THING
YOU HAVEN'T PREPARED FOR --
174
00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:07,116
A BETTER IDEA.
175
00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:10,995
THE COUP DE GRACE, THE CROWN ON
THE HEAD OF HALLOWEEN PRANKS!
176
00:06:11,079 --> 00:06:13,122
>> OH-HO, I LIKE WHERE YOU'RE
GOING.
177
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:13,790
ALL RIGHT.
178
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:14,874
WHAT'S THE IDEA?
179
00:06:14,957 --> 00:06:19,128
>> Hank: A NIGHT IN A REAL
HAUNTED HOUSE.
180
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:20,088
>> Dean: OLD MAN POTTER?
181
00:06:20,171 --> 00:06:22,090
>> Hank: AND BINGO WAS HIS
NAME-O.
182
00:06:22,173 --> 00:06:23,049
>> Dean: NO WAY. COUNT ME OUT.
183
00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:24,550
DAD SAID WE SHOULD NEVER GO OVER
THERE.
184
00:06:24,634 --> 00:06:26,552
>> [ Mockingly ] OH, MY DAD SAID
I COULD NEVER GO.
185
00:06:26,636 --> 00:06:28,137
BOO, HOO, HOO, I'M DEAN.
186
00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:30,723
>> Hank: DEAN, WE ARE MEN OLD
ENOUGH TO GROW HAIR ON OUR
187
00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:31,641
BALLS!
188
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:35,311
NOW IT'S TIME WE USE 'EM BEFORE
SOMETHING ELSE GROWS ON 'EM!
189
00:06:35,394 --> 00:06:38,314
>> YEAH, GO HOME, PUT ON THE
KIDZ BOP VERSION OF "THRILLER,"
190
00:06:38,397 --> 00:06:40,483
THEN WATCH THE PEANUTS SPECIAL
LIKE EVERY YEAR.
191
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:42,652
>> Both: GO, TEAM VENTURE.
192
00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:43,486
>> Dean: NO!
193
00:06:43,569 --> 00:06:45,029
FINE, I'M GOING WITH YOU GUYS.
194
00:06:45,113 --> 00:06:47,198
I'LL SHOW YOU WHO THE REAL
BABIES ARE!
195
00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:52,036
>> Dr. Venture: WHAT ARE THESE,
KING SIZE?
196
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,204
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
197
00:06:53,287 --> 00:06:55,665
WE HAND OUT FUN SIZE HERE,
HATRED.
198
00:06:55,748 --> 00:06:58,251
>> DOC, WE ARE 15 MILES FROM THE
NEAREST HOUSE.
199
00:06:58,334 --> 00:07:00,878
WE GOT AN ELECTRIC FENCE,
MOTION-SENSITIVE LASER DEFENSE
200
00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:02,338
MODULES.
201
00:07:02,421 --> 00:07:04,841
IF A KID MAKES IT TO THAT FRONT
DOOR, THEY'RE GETTING THE BIG
202
00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:05,675
CANDY BAR!
203
00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:09,262
[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]
>> JUST FILL IT FOR ME.
204
00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:10,847
I LITERALLY NEED A HAND HERE.
205
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:11,347
>> NO!
206
00:07:11,430 --> 00:07:12,598
NO DRINKING.
207
00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:15,476
I'M THE ONE WHO HAS TO HOLD YOUR
HAIR WHILE YOU THROW UP!
208
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:16,978
>> I CAN HOLD OUR LIQUOR, SIR!
209
00:07:17,061 --> 00:07:20,189
>> THE LAST TIME YOU DID THIS,
YOU VOMITED FOR A SOLID HOUR!
210
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,150
I SWEAR I SAW A LICENSE PLATE
COME UP.
211
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:23,985
IT WAS LIKE WE WERE GUTTING A
TIGER SHARK!
212
00:07:24,068 --> 00:07:27,196
>> HE HAD HIS RIBS REMOVED SO HE
COULD JUST BEND OVER AND ENJOY
213
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,781
HIS OWN...YOU KNOW.
214
00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:30,700
WELL, THAT'S WHAT I HEARD,
ANYWAY.
215
00:07:30,783 --> 00:07:31,325
>> MARILYN MANSON?
216
00:07:31,409 --> 00:07:32,493
ARE YOU SURE?
217
00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:34,120
I HEARD IT WAS CHER THAT HAD THE
RIBS REMOVED.
218
00:07:34,203 --> 00:07:37,039
>> WHY WOULD SHE -- CHER DOESN'T
EVEN HAVE A...YOU KNOW.
219
00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:39,834
>> I HAVE YET TO MEET A WOMAN
THAT DOESN'T DRESS SEXY ON
220
00:07:39,917 --> 00:07:40,376
HALLOWEEN.
221
00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:41,335
WITCH?
222
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:43,588
NO, SIR -- SEXY WITCH.
223
00:07:43,671 --> 00:07:44,380
FREDDIE KRUEGER?
224
00:07:44,463 --> 00:07:45,882
NOPE -- SEXY FREDDIE KRUEGER.
225
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:46,632
HM.
226
00:07:46,716 --> 00:07:48,718
SEXY DAMN FREDDIE KRUEGER.
227
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:52,722
>> Dr. Orpheus: ALL YE OF
MAGICAL DISCIPLINES, THE CURTAIN
228
00:07:52,805 --> 00:07:54,891
TO THE NETHERWORLD IS
THREADBARE!
229
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:57,059
THE VEIL NEED NOT BE LIFTED.
230
00:07:57,143 --> 00:08:00,229
ON THIS NIGHT, WE NEED ONLY TO
PEER THROUGH IT.
231
00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:03,983
MAY ALL WHO ENTER THIS CIRCLE
HARNESS THIS SAUIN AND MAY
232
00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:05,610
THEIR MAGIC BE TRUE!
233
00:08:05,693 --> 00:08:09,614
WELCOME TO THE BRIMSTONE
ASSEMBLY!
234
00:08:09,697 --> 00:08:12,742
[ ALL CHEER ]
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
235
00:08:12,825 --> 00:08:14,076
>> OH-HO-HO, YE OF LITTLE FAITH!
236
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,786
>> Dr. Venture: I OWE YOU
5 BUCKS.
237
00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:16,579
>> KNEW IT!
238
00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:19,207
THOSE LASERS HAVE A DILLY OF A
TIME HITTING SMALL THINGS.
239
00:08:19,290 --> 00:08:20,374
>> Both: TRICK OR TREAT!
240
00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:22,710
>> Dr. Venture: OH, PETE AND
BILLY DON'T COUNT.
241
00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:23,586
NO PAYOUT.
242
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,004
>> FINE, NO PAYOUT.
243
00:08:25,087 --> 00:08:26,130
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS?
244
00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:27,757
>> I'M THE THINNER, WHITER DUKE.
245
00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:30,676
>> AND I'M RUSTY VENTURE, BOY
ADVENTURER.
246
00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:32,553
>> Dr. Venture: THAT'S MORE
DISTURBING THAN FLATTERING.
247
00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:33,721
>> OHH, KING SIZE!
248
00:08:34,055 --> 00:08:37,099
>> PFFT, LAST YEAR, DOC GAVE US
A LITTLE THING OF SMARTIES TO
249
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,684
SPLIT BETWEEN THE BOTH OF US!
250
00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:40,978
>> Dr. Venture: WANT TO DOUBLE
THE WAGER?
251
00:08:41,062 --> 00:08:42,730
>> OH, I'LL TRIPLE IT!
252
00:08:42,813 --> 00:08:43,731
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
253
00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:46,234
>> Dr. Venture: WHY ARE YOU
STILL HERE?
254
00:08:46,317 --> 00:08:47,526
>> WE CAME TO HANG OUT WITH YOU
GUYS.
255
00:08:48,402 --> 00:08:51,155
>> Dr. Orpheus: WITH THE WEIGHT
OF A PLUME...
256
00:08:51,239 --> 00:08:53,032
>> AS INFLEXIBLE AS CUT
TIMBER...
257
00:08:53,115 --> 00:08:55,117
>> Both: WE RAISE ALOFT.
258
00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,786
[ ALL GASP ]
>> EXCELLENT!
259
00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:58,246
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> OH, THAT IS THE WORK OF THE
260
00:08:58,329 --> 00:08:58,996
DEVIL!
261
00:08:59,538 --> 00:09:01,999
>> THAT IS THE WORK OF A TEENAGE
GIRL'S SLEEPOVER!
262
00:09:02,833 --> 00:09:05,544
[ OWL HOOTS, CRICKETS CHIRPING ]
>> SO, UH, IS OLD MAN POTTER,
263
00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:07,630
LIKE, SOME SORT OF A CHILD
MURDERER OR SOMETHING COOL?
264
00:09:07,713 --> 00:09:08,965
>> Hank: NO IDEA.
265
00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:10,883
MY POP JUST TOLD US OUR WHOLE
LIFE TO KEEP AWAY FROM THE
266
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:11,300
POTTER PLACE.
267
00:09:11,717 --> 00:09:12,677
NEVER SAID WHY.
268
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:15,137
>> HE PROBABLY SKINS CHILDREN
AND MAKES SHOES OUT OF 'EM OR
269
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:15,805
SOMETHING.
270
00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:18,349
MAN, I NEVER KNEW THIS PLACE WAS
HERE.
271
00:09:18,432 --> 00:09:19,850
>> Dean: I'M PRETTY SURE THIS IS
ALL PART OF OUR PROPERTY.
272
00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:20,393
>> OH, YEAH.
273
00:09:20,726 --> 00:09:22,311
I'M SURE IT IS, RICHIE RICH.
274
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:25,106
WELL, YOU KNOW, SINCE YOU OWN
IT, WHY DON'T YOU GO INSIDE
275
00:09:25,189 --> 00:09:25,773
FIRST?
276
00:09:25,856 --> 00:09:26,399
>> Dean: WHY DON'T YOU?
277
00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:27,525
>> 1, 2, 3.
>> Both: NOT IT!
278
00:09:27,608 --> 00:09:27,900
>> Dean: NOT IT.
279
00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:29,402
YOU KNOW WHAT? FINE.
280
00:09:29,485 --> 00:09:31,404
I-IT'S JUST AN OLD HOUSE ANYWAY.
281
00:09:31,487 --> 00:09:32,613
GIMME THE FLASHLIGHT.
282
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:35,950
>> IS HE BRAVE OR STUPID?
283
00:09:36,033 --> 00:09:37,994
>> Hank: MM, I THINK HE JUST
WANTS TO BE ALONE.
284
00:09:55,094 --> 00:09:59,223
[ WOOD CREAKS ]
>> Dean: HELLO?
285
00:09:59,307 --> 00:10:03,602
[ SPITTING ]
HELLO?
286
00:10:03,686 --> 00:10:06,480
IS ANYONE IN HERE?
287
00:10:09,191 --> 00:10:10,109
HELLO?
288
00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:14,488
ALL RIGHT. SCREW THIS.
289
00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:16,157
IT'S BEEN LONG ENOUGH.
290
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:17,241
>> [ GRUNTS ]
>> AAH!
291
00:10:17,325 --> 00:10:21,203
>> [ ROARS ]
>> AAH! AAH! YAH!
292
00:10:26,625 --> 00:10:31,130
IDIOPATHIC HIRSUTISM IN THE
ORBITAL REGION, YET CLEAR EARLY
293
00:10:31,213 --> 00:10:32,840
STAGE ANDROGENIC ALOPECIA.
294
00:10:32,923 --> 00:10:34,216
POOR LITTLE BASTARD.
295
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:37,511
PROBABLY A GENETIC SOURCE, AS
THE TESTOSTERONE BALANCE SEEMS
296
00:10:37,595 --> 00:10:41,015
ADEQUATE, JUDGING FROM THE NEAR
LANUGO FACIAL DISPLAY.
297
00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:43,184
EH, PUPILLARY RESPONSE GOOD.
298
00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:46,312
THE SUBJECT IS FREE OF ANY
FETIFORM TERATOMA AND APPEARS TO
299
00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:48,439
HAVE NORMAL HEART AND LUNG
FUNCTION.
300
00:10:48,522 --> 00:10:50,900
IT'S AN IMPRESSIVE BAG OF MEAT,
THIS ONE.
301
00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:52,777
WAIT, NO, D-- GET OUT OF THERE!
302
00:10:52,860 --> 00:10:55,237
>> [ SCREECHES ]
>> WE DO NOT SMELL BALLS, RICO!
303
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:56,280
BAD BOY! DOWN!
304
00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:59,283
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> WELL, THAT WAS...A
305
00:10:59,367 --> 00:10:59,909
>> OHH.
306
00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:01,535
...NICE...TRY.
307
00:11:01,619 --> 00:11:02,453
IT USUALLY WORKS.
308
00:11:02,536 --> 00:11:04,789
>> SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU
BLASPHEMER!
309
00:11:04,872 --> 00:11:08,959
>> Dr. Orpheus: WELL, THAT WAS A
NICE ATTEMPT AT A CONJURING BY
310
00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:09,668
OUR FRIEND CHRIS.
311
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:10,795
>> CURSE!
312
00:11:11,670 --> 00:11:14,173
NOT CHRIS -- IT'S CURSE!
313
00:11:11,670 --> 00:11:14,173
>> Dr. Orpheus: AND NOW WE HAVE
RED MANTLE, ONE OF THE OLDEST
314
00:11:14,256 --> 00:11:17,301
MEMBERS OF THE BRIMSTONE
ASSEMBLY WITH HIS, UH, AH, HIS,
315
00:11:17,385 --> 00:11:19,428
UH --
>> TWIST ON A CLASSIC!
316
00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:21,430
>> YOU GONNA PLAY THE BANJO
WHILE HE SINGS "MAMMY"?
317
00:11:21,514 --> 00:11:22,723
>> NO!
>> I'M ROSY GRIER.
318
00:11:22,807 --> 00:11:24,266
>> I WILL, IF YOU ALL
CONCENTRATE WITH ME AND HARNESS
319
00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:26,435
THE SPIRITS THAT ROAM FREE ON
THIS ALL HALLOWS EVE...
320
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:29,355
>> HE DIDN'T TELL ME ABOUT THIS
EASY BAKE COVEN HE'S A PART OF.
321
00:11:29,438 --> 00:11:32,108
>> ...ATTEMPT TO PULL A RABBIT
FROM THIS HAT!
322
00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:34,193
>> SO, WHERE'S THE TWIST,
BULLWINKLE?
323
00:11:34,276 --> 00:11:35,778
>> I'M ACTUALLY GONNA DO IT!
324
00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:38,114
ACTUALLY PULL A RABBIT FROM THIS
HAT!
325
00:11:38,197 --> 00:11:40,199
THERE'S NOTHING UP MY SLEEVES OR
ANYTHING!
326
00:11:40,282 --> 00:11:40,950
>> THAT'S WHAT THEY ALL SAY.
327
00:11:41,033 --> 00:11:42,701
>> NO, SERIOUSLY!
328
00:11:42,785 --> 00:11:44,120
I'M GOING TO DO IT FOR REAL!
329
00:11:44,203 --> 00:11:45,121
IT'S REALLY HARD!
330
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:46,372
>> OH, UH, THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!
331
00:11:46,455 --> 00:11:48,374
>> OH, SHE SAID NOTHING OF THE
SORT!
332
00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:50,793
[ CRICKETS CHIRPING ]
>> Dr. Venture: COME ON.
333
00:11:50,876 --> 00:11:52,503
COME ON. COME ON. COME ON!
334
00:11:52,586 --> 00:11:55,089
[ LASER SENTRIES BEEPING ]
>> EHH, NO.
335
00:11:55,172 --> 00:11:56,340
>> [ CHUCKLES ] NICE.
336
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:57,466
>> Dr. Venture: OHH, SO CLOSE.
337
00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:59,301
10 MORE FEET, AND I WOULD'VE
WON.
338
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,762
>> I'M TELLING YOU, THEY'RE WAY
BETTER OFF WITHOUT THEIR
339
00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:02,763
PARENTS.
340
00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:04,306
THOSE LASERS JUST PICK 'EM RIGHT
OFF.
341
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:05,808
>> I HAD MY MONEY ON ELECTRIC
FENCE.
342
00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:06,600
WHO HAD LASER SENTRY?
343
00:12:06,684 --> 00:12:07,393
>> I HAD LASERS!
344
00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:10,563
OH, THAT IS 10 BUCKS FROM EACH
OF YOU.
345
00:12:10,646 --> 00:12:13,566
>> RUST, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS,
COLA AND TOMATO SOUP?
346
00:12:13,649 --> 00:12:15,151
>> Dr. Venture: CLOSE.
347
00:12:15,234 --> 00:12:16,402
IT'S KETCHUP AND BOURBON.
348
00:12:16,485 --> 00:12:17,695
I CALL IT A HUNCHBACK.
349
00:12:17,778 --> 00:12:20,281
HANK GAVE ME THE IDEA A LONG
TIME AGO.
350
00:12:20,364 --> 00:12:22,324
[ COYOTE HOWLS ]
>> NAH, THE PRETZEL PART IS
351
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:23,617
LAME.
352
00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:24,743
IT'S REALLY THOSE LITTLE
PUMPERNICKEL SLICES THAT ARE
353
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:26,203
SO --
>> Hank: WRONG. IT'S -- IT'S THE
354
00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:27,580
ACTUAL CEREAL PIECES.
355
00:12:27,663 --> 00:12:29,748
>> [ Chuckling ] OH, MY GOD,
WHEN THEY'RE FILLED WITH THAT
356
00:12:29,832 --> 00:12:30,833
BIG HUNK OF FLAVOR STUFF?
357
00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:31,625
>> Hank: PRECISELY!
358
00:12:31,709 --> 00:12:32,710
THOSE ARE THE BEST PART!
359
00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:34,378
>> OH, TOTALLY.
360
00:12:34,462 --> 00:12:36,172
>> Hank: SHOULD WE GO GET HIM?
361
00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:37,256
>> YOU WANT TO GET CHEX MIX?
362
00:12:37,339 --> 00:12:38,424
>> Hank: NO, GET HIM.
363
00:12:38,507 --> 00:12:39,216
GET DEAN.
364
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,426
HE'S BEEN IN THERE FOREVER.
365
00:12:40,509 --> 00:12:41,051
>> NO WAY.
366
00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:42,219
HE'S GOING FOR IT.
367
00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:43,429
A NIGHT IN A HAUNTED HOUSE?
368
00:12:43,512 --> 00:12:44,680
COME ON, FREAKING CLASSIC!
369
00:12:44,763 --> 00:12:46,765
IT'S THE ONLY COOL THING HE'S
EVER DONE.
370
00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:49,685
>> Dean: [ SIGHS ]
HUH?
371
00:12:49,768 --> 00:12:51,520
WHAT'S THOSE -- WHAT'S GOING ON?
372
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:52,563
>> OH, YOU'RE AWAKE.
373
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:53,189
FINALLY.
374
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:55,399
YOU'VE BEEN OUT FOR AN HOUR ON
ONE HIT OF CHLOROFORM,
375
00:12:55,483 --> 00:12:56,275
LIGHTWEIGHT.
376
00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:58,527
EH, YOUR BROTHER'S THE SAME
THING -- SLEEPS LIKE 10 HOURS A
377
00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:00,988
DAY EVER SINCE YOU STOPPED WITH
THE LEARNING BEDS.
378
00:13:01,071 --> 00:13:01,989
>> Dean: OH, WHAT'S -- WHAT'S
GOING ON HERE?
379
00:13:02,072 --> 00:13:03,407
HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?
380
00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:06,202
>> I'VE BEEN WATCHING YOU YOUR
WHOLE LIFE, SINCE YOU WERE BORN,
381
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:07,536
AND EVERY TIME AFTER THAT.
382
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:08,954
>> Dean: WHAT ARE YOU, SOME
SORT OF PERV?
383
00:13:09,038 --> 00:13:09,663
>> HEH, HARDLY.
384
00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,373
YOU DON'T KNOW WHO I AM, DO YOU?
385
00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:13,083
YOUR DAD NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT
ME?
386
00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:15,419
>> Dean: HE JUST SAID TO STAY
AWAY FROM THE POTTER HOUSE.
387
00:13:15,503 --> 00:13:16,545
>> WHO THE FUCK IS POTTER?
388
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:17,379
MY NAME'S BEN.
389
00:13:17,963 --> 00:13:20,549
WAIT, DID HE SAY STAY AWAY FROM
POTTER'S FIELD?
390
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,218
>> Dean: I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE.
391
00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:23,010
>> WELL, THAT MAKES SENSE.
392
00:13:23,093 --> 00:13:23,677
THAT WHOLE FIELD OUT THERE?
393
00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:25,054
MASS GRAVE.
394
00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:27,431
BETWEEN YOUR GRANDPAP AND YOUR
OLD MAN, THERE'S BEEN HUNDREDS
395
00:13:27,515 --> 00:13:28,974
OF PEOPLE KILLED ON YOUR
PROPERTY.
396
00:13:29,433 --> 00:13:31,018
ALL OF 'EM ARE BURIED OUT THERE.
397
00:13:31,101 --> 00:13:33,103
THEY CALL THOSE POTTER'S FIELDS,
BUT I AIN'T POTTER.
398
00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:33,854
I'M BEN.
399
00:13:34,855 --> 00:13:36,190
>> [ CHATTERS ]
>> Dean: OH, GROSS!
400
00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:36,815
COME ON!
401
00:13:36,899 --> 00:13:37,816
GET THAT THING OFF ME!
402
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,236
>> RICO, WHAT -- WHAT IS YOUR
PROBLEM?!
403
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:42,238
>> [ SCREECHES, GRUNTS ]
>> YEAH, LOOKS LIKE RICO LIKES
404
00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:43,614
YOU -- OR YOUR BALLS AT LEAST.
405
00:13:43,697 --> 00:13:45,115
>> Dean: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT
THING?
406
00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:45,741
>> OH, RICO?
407
00:13:46,116 --> 00:13:48,077
RECOMBINANT LUSUS NATURAE.
408
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:49,620
THAT'S HIS FULL, FANCY NAME.
409
00:13:49,703 --> 00:13:51,413
HE'S NOT USED TO GUESTS.
410
00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:52,456
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S UP WITH HIM.
411
00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:53,457
>> Dean: LISTEN, MISTER.
412
00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:54,708
CAN YOU JUST LET ME DOWN?
413
00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:55,834
I WON'T HURT YOU OR ANYTHING.
414
00:13:56,335 --> 00:13:57,086
I PROMISE.
415
00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:57,586
>> NO. NO, NO, NO.
416
00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:58,587
OF COURSE.
417
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,047
OH, YOU'RE NOT A PRISONER OR
NOTHING.
418
00:14:00,130 --> 00:14:01,757
NAH, I JUST WANTED TO SEE HOW
YOU TURNED OUT.
419
00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:03,133
YOU'RE A DAMN MIRACLE!
420
00:14:03,217 --> 00:14:05,427
WELL, YOU GOT THE ONSET OF
OCULAR DEGRADATION, BUT I THINK
421
00:14:05,511 --> 00:14:07,638
YOU'LL LOOK GOOD IN BUDDY HOLLY
GLASSES OR SOMETHING.
422
00:14:07,721 --> 00:14:09,181
>> Dean: WHY DO YOU CARE HOW I
TURNED OUT?
423
00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:10,766
>> I CARE BECAUSE...
424
00:14:10,849 --> 00:14:14,562
WELL, I GUESS YOU COULD SAY THAT
I CARE...BECAUSE I BROUGHT YOU
425
00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:17,189
INTO THIS WORLD.
426
00:14:17,273 --> 00:14:18,399
>> ALMOST GOT IT!
427
00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:21,902
[ CHUCKLES ]
THE BLUE SIDE KEEPS GETTING
428
00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:24,280
MESSED UP WHEN I DO THE RED
SIDE.
429
00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:25,447
>> SUBMIT TO DESIRE.
430
00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:27,783
I OFFER YOU ULTIMATE PLEASURE.
431
00:14:27,866 --> 00:14:28,784
YOUR THIRST.
432
00:14:28,867 --> 00:14:31,287
YOUR LUST IS HUNGER.
433
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:35,583
SUBMIT TO MY TOAST -- MY
PLEASURE TOAST.
434
00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:36,959
YOU HUNGER FOR IT.
435
00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:37,626
>> NOPE, WAIT!
436
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:38,502
NOW I'VE GOT IT!
437
00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:40,546
LOOK, ALL SIDES!
438
00:14:41,130 --> 00:14:41,213
AAH.
439
00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:42,339
AAH.
440
00:14:42,423 --> 00:14:44,300
[ SIGHS ]
SUPER, WELL, TA-DA!
441
00:14:44,383 --> 00:14:45,134
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> OH, WOW.
442
00:14:45,217 --> 00:14:46,552
>> WOW, VERY GOOD. VERY GOOD.
443
00:14:46,635 --> 00:14:47,720
>> OH, MAN. I'M GLAD WE'RE BACK.
444
00:14:47,803 --> 00:14:48,721
>> ARE THEY DONE?
445
00:14:48,804 --> 00:14:49,638
>> YES, FINALLY.
446
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:50,639
THAT WAS HORRIBLE!
447
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,141
>> OH, UNGODLY BLASPHEMERS!
448
00:14:52,224 --> 00:14:53,684
>> NO, HERE I AGREE WITH YOU.
449
00:14:53,767 --> 00:14:54,977
THAT WAS WAY TOO KINKY!
450
00:14:55,060 --> 00:14:57,980
>> Dr. Orpheus: WELL, I
CERTAINLY HOPE THAT KIND OF
451
00:14:58,063 --> 00:15:00,983
MAGIC DOES NOT OCCUR IN THEIR
HOME, WHAT WITH THEM RAISING MY
452
00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:01,775
CHILD!
453
00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:03,277
>> OH, YOU OLD FUDDY-DUDDY.
454
00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:04,194
LET IT GO!
455
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:05,529
GO OUTSIDE AND COOL OFF.
456
00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:07,698
>> Dr. Orpheus: [ BREATHES
DEEPLY ]
457
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:13,203
NOW, HUH, LET US WELCOME YOUR
FAVORITE SEEKER OF TRUTH,
458
00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:14,330
THE ALCHEMIST.
459
00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:15,539
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> THANK YOU.
460
00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:16,832
YOU'RE VERY GENEROUS.
461
00:15:16,915 --> 00:15:18,208
OKAY, NEWS FLASH!
462
00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:20,919
THIS IS COMPLETELY LAME!
463
00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:22,171
IT'S HALLOWEEN, PEOPLE!
464
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:24,506
LET'S GET DOWN TO SOME RAISIN'
OF THE DEAD!
465
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:27,092
LET'S MAKE SOME ZOMBIES, HUH?!
466
00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:28,844
AM I WRONG?!
467
00:15:28,927 --> 00:15:32,389
>> YOU ARE WRONG, AND YOU ARE A
DARK-SIDED BLASPHEMER!
468
00:15:32,473 --> 00:15:34,391
>> AH, ANYONE BESIDES AL JOLSON?
469
00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:35,184
OKAY!
470
00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:36,977
LET'S GET IT ON!
471
00:15:39,938 --> 00:15:43,317
>> Dr. Orpheus: [ SIGHS ]
>> ALL RIGHT. YEAH.
472
00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:44,568
I SEE THE BELT.
473
00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:47,321
BUT THE HUNTER PART IS, LIKE,
IT'S A BUNCH OF STARS.
474
00:15:47,404 --> 00:15:49,323
>> Hank: YEAH, IT'S A STRETCH, I
KNOW.
475
00:15:49,406 --> 00:15:50,199
[ SNIFFS ]
AW, DUDE!
476
00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:51,700
DID YOU JUST SBD?
477
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:52,701
>> OH, YEAH -- 100%.
478
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,662
I AM BAKING BROWNIES IN THE BACK
DOOR.
479
00:15:54,745 --> 00:15:56,288
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON.
480
00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:56,997
>> Hank: AW, AW, HUH, OH!
481
00:15:57,081 --> 00:15:58,207
IT SMELLS JUST LIKE FOOD!
482
00:15:58,290 --> 00:15:58,832
OH!
483
00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:00,376
>> HEY, UH, HANK, YOU WANT A
CUPCAKE?
484
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:01,460
>> Hank: WHY, YOU GOT ONE?
485
00:16:01,543 --> 00:16:02,670
>> [ FARTS ]
CUPCAKE.
486
00:16:02,753 --> 00:16:04,546
>> Hank: [ GAGS, COUGHS ]
KNOCK IT OFF!
487
00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:06,382
>> YOU SAID YOU WANTED A
CUPCAKE!
488
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:07,049
>> Hank: OH!
489
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:08,175
[ THUD ]
OH, HEY.
490
00:16:08,258 --> 00:16:09,385
DUDE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
491
00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:10,552
>> WHAT? NOTHING.
492
00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:13,514
[ MUFFLED ROAR ]
[ BOTH GASP ]
493
00:16:13,597 --> 00:16:15,724
>> Hank: [ STAMMERING ]
>> WHOA!
494
00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:24,942
>> Hank: [ STAMMERING ]
>> WHOA! WHOA!
495
00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:25,734
MOVE, DUDE!
496
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:28,904
>> Hank: SUPER FUCKING RUN AWAY!
497
00:16:28,987 --> 00:16:30,739
>> Dean: [ GASPING ]
>> DEAN, CALM DOWN, WILL YA?
498
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,574
YOU'RE TAKING THIS ALL WRONG.
499
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:33,409
>> Dean: WRONG?!
500
00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:37,496
YOU'RE TELLING ME I'M A CLONE,
THAT I'M NOT EVEN DEAN, THAT I'M
501
00:16:37,579 --> 00:16:38,914
SOME STUPID SCIENCE EXPERIMENT!
502
00:16:38,997 --> 00:16:40,040
HOW DO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE IT?!
503
00:16:40,124 --> 00:16:40,499
>> NO, COME ON.
504
00:16:40,582 --> 00:16:40,958
NO, NO, NO.
505
00:16:41,041 --> 00:16:41,667
YOU'RE DEAN.
506
00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:42,418
THERE'S NO OTHER DEAN.
507
00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:43,585
YOU'RE IT, FLESH AND BLOOD.
508
00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:46,422
LOOK, I WAS CONCEIVED IN THE
BACKSEAT OF A PACKARD.
509
00:16:46,505 --> 00:16:46,922
YOU WERE CONCEIVED IN A TANK.
510
00:16:47,005 --> 00:16:47,589
SO WHAT?
511
00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:50,050
>> Dean: SO I HAVE NO MOMMY, NO
NOTHING?!
512
00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:51,343
>> DEAN, YOU HAVE IT ALL WRONG.
513
00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:53,971
YOU HAVE A MOMMY, AND YOUR DAD
IS YOUR DAD.
514
00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:56,890
THEY MADE YOU BY GETTING DRUNK
AND FORGETTING TO WEAR A CONDOM,
515
00:16:56,974 --> 00:16:57,975
LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.
516
00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:03,063
AND YOUR DAD LOVED YOU SO MUCH
THAT WHEN YOU GOT A BOO-BOO, HE
517
00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,441
KISSED IT AND MADE IT ALL BETTER
AND MADE IT GO AWAY.
518
00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:07,067
>> Dean: YOU BROUGHT ME BACK TO
LIFE!
519
00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:07,776
>> YEAH, OKAY.
520
00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:10,571
WELL, YOU AND YOUR BROTHER HAD
SOME PRETTY BIG BOO-BOOS.
521
00:17:10,654 --> 00:17:12,823
>> Dean: I'M FREAKIN'
FRANKENSTEIN -- I MEAN,
522
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:13,949
FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER...
523
00:17:14,491 --> 00:17:14,950
WHATEVER!
524
00:17:15,367 --> 00:17:16,368
YOU CAN'T PLAY GOD!
525
00:17:16,452 --> 00:17:17,786
>> WILL YOU KNOCK IT OFF?
526
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:20,289
WE DIDN'T MAKE YOU FROM A LOTUS
FLOWER, DEAN.
527
00:17:20,372 --> 00:17:21,415
WE MADE YOU FROM YOU.
528
00:17:21,498 --> 00:17:22,541
>> Dean: IT'S JUST...
529
00:17:22,624 --> 00:17:23,625
IT'S JUST SO WRONG!
530
00:17:24,084 --> 00:17:25,461
>> HAVE A KID ONE DAY, DEAN.
531
00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:28,505
HOLD ITS LIFELESS BODY IN YOUR
ARMS, AND THEN TELL ME HOW WRONG
532
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:29,548
IT IS.
533
00:17:30,048 --> 00:17:32,885
YOUR GRANDPAP AND I PERFECTED
GENETIC ENGINEERING BECAUSE GOD
534
00:17:32,968 --> 00:17:35,095
OR WHATEVER GAVE US A PERFECT
MAP TO DO SO.
535
00:17:35,846 --> 00:17:39,224
JONAS, ME, AND, YES, YOUR DAD
SAW IT AS NOTHING MORE THAN A
536
00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:41,894
FUCKING BAND-AID FOR A REALLY
BIG BOO-BOO.
537
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:44,480
HEY, YOU -- YOU WANT A BEER?
538
00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:45,981
>> Dean: I THINK I DO.
539
00:17:46,064 --> 00:17:47,900
>> DON'T TELL YOUR DAD.
540
00:17:51,570 --> 00:17:53,614
[ ZOMBIES GROWLING ]
541
00:18:08,253 --> 00:18:08,796
>> HO! HO! HO!
542
00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:18,680
[ BELLS JINGLING ]
[ ZOMBIES SCREAM ]
543
00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:19,723
>> THEY'RE GONNA MAKE IT.
544
00:18:19,807 --> 00:18:20,808
>> OH, MAN!
545
00:18:20,891 --> 00:18:22,643
I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS MONEY
ON THIS!
546
00:18:22,726 --> 00:18:24,645
THIS IS GONNA BE A MASSIVE
PAYOUT!
547
00:18:24,728 --> 00:18:27,022
>> Dr. Venture: OH, DON'T START
COUNTING IT YET.
548
00:18:27,105 --> 00:18:29,650
THEY HAVE TWO MORE SENTRIES
LEFT, AND THAT PIRATE LOOKS
549
00:18:29,733 --> 00:18:30,400
PRETTY TALL.
550
00:18:30,484 --> 00:18:31,235
>> COME ON, KID!
551
00:18:31,318 --> 00:18:32,569
JUMP AROUND A LITTLE!
552
00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:33,862
>> NO, YOU STAY NICE AND STEADY.
553
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:35,989
STRAIGHT LINE BETWEEN YOU AND
THE CANDY.
554
00:18:36,073 --> 00:18:39,535
NICE...AND...STRAIGHT.
555
00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:40,994
[ DOORBELL RINGS ]
YEAH!
556
00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:41,537
>> AWW!
557
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:42,412
>> AMAZING!
558
00:18:42,496 --> 00:18:43,705
>> Dr. Venture: OH, THAT'S
INSANE!
559
00:18:43,789 --> 00:18:44,706
>> All: TRICK OR TREAT!
560
00:18:44,790 --> 00:18:51,046
>> YOU ARE THE LUCKIEST KIDS
EVER!
561
00:18:51,129 --> 00:18:53,632
[ ALL GASP ]
>> GREETINGS SHIT HEADS.
562
00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:54,216
>> OH.
563
00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:54,758
>> WOW.
564
00:18:54,842 --> 00:18:55,551
>> OH, DEAR.
565
00:18:55,634 --> 00:18:56,718
>> WHAT'S GOING ON?
566
00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:58,220
>> BOW DOWN, YOU BUFFOONS!
567
00:18:58,303 --> 00:18:59,346
THAT'S THE MASTER!
568
00:18:59,429 --> 00:19:00,931
>> AH, IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME!
569
00:19:01,014 --> 00:19:02,641
>> HELLO. YOU ALL KNOW ME.
570
00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:04,226
I LIVE IN MANY OF YOUR CLOSETS.
571
00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:05,269
AND GUESS WHAT?
572
00:19:05,352 --> 00:19:07,729
YOU DINKS HAVE FORCED ME OUT OF
THE CLOSET.
573
00:19:07,813 --> 00:19:08,730
>> YOU GO, GIRL!
574
00:19:08,814 --> 00:19:10,065
>> SOLIDARITY, MY BROTHER!
575
00:19:10,148 --> 00:19:13,235
>> MY MASTER, WHY HAVE YOU
CHOSEN THE FORM OF FATHER
576
00:19:13,318 --> 00:19:13,986
CHRISTMAS?
577
00:19:14,069 --> 00:19:15,070
>> OH, I'M SORRY.
578
00:19:15,153 --> 00:19:17,739
SHOULD I HAVE CHOSEN THE
HALLOWEEN FERRET?
579
00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:19,241
NOT A LOT OF OPTIONS HERE, PAL.
580
00:19:19,324 --> 00:19:20,450
>> YOU'RE NOT SANTA!
581
00:19:20,534 --> 00:19:21,368
YOU ARE THE DEVIL!
582
00:19:21,451 --> 00:19:22,744
HOW DARE -- OHH...
583
00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:25,956
>> RED MANTLE, YOU KNOW BETTER
THAN BRINGING A NORMAL HERE,
584
00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:27,666
EVEN IF HE IS WEARING BLACK.
585
00:19:27,749 --> 00:19:28,792
THAT'S NOT COOL.
586
00:19:28,876 --> 00:19:30,794
>> I DIDN'T WANT TO MISS THE
PARTY.
587
00:19:30,878 --> 00:19:31,837
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
588
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:33,297
THE PARTY'S OVER, OKAY?
589
00:19:33,380 --> 00:19:36,592
I JUST HAD TO PUT HUNDREDS OF
ZOMBIES BACK IN THE GROUND.
590
00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:39,052
YOU'VE LOST THE TRUE MEANING OF
CHRISTMAS.
591
00:19:39,136 --> 00:19:42,264
THIS IS THE DAY THAT A BABY WAS
BORN TO REMIND US THAT WE
592
00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:46,810
SHOULDN'T RAISE AN ARMY OF DEAD
GUYS JUST BECAUSE WE CAN!
593
00:19:46,894 --> 00:19:49,229
>> Dr. Orpheus: [ BREATHES
DEEPLY ]
594
00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:50,606
>> TRICK OR TREAT!
595
00:19:50,689 --> 00:19:52,608
>> Dr. Orpheus: OH, WELL!
596
00:19:52,691 --> 00:19:53,650
LOOK AT YOU!
597
00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:54,610
OH, MY.
598
00:19:54,693 --> 00:19:57,112
AH, COULD YOU WAIT HERE
MOMENTARILY?
599
00:19:57,195 --> 00:20:02,951
I HAVE SOME DELICIOUS HORS
D'OEUVRES INSIDE.
600
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:04,202
>> OH, HEY, ORPHEUS.
601
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:05,787
YOU MISSED ALL THE FUN.
602
00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:10,459
YOUR IDIOT FRIENDS HAD THE GREAT
IDEA TO REANIMATE A GRAVEYARD.
603
00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:11,293
ISN'T THAT NEAT?
604
00:20:11,376 --> 00:20:12,794
>> Dr. Orpheus: NOT NEAT!
605
00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:14,838
THERE ARE CHILDREN WALKING THE
STREETS!
606
00:20:14,922 --> 00:20:16,757
I'M SO DISAPPOINTED IN ALL OF
YOU!
607
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:17,799
>> OOH, I SMELL A LECTURE.
608
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:19,509
OKAY, OKAY, TAKE IT EASY ON 'EM.
609
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:22,012
THEY DIDN'T KNOW THAT DADDY
KEEPS BULLETS IN HIS GUN.
610
00:20:22,095 --> 00:20:24,097
>> Dr. Orpheus: I WILL, MY
MASTER.
611
00:20:24,181 --> 00:20:26,016
>> YOU'RE MY BEST PUPIL AND ALL
THAT CRAP.
612
00:20:26,099 --> 00:20:28,101
>> Dr. Orpheus: THANK YOU, MY
MASTER.
613
00:20:28,185 --> 00:20:29,311
>> YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
614
00:20:29,394 --> 00:20:31,897
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND TO
ALL A GOOD NIGHT.
615
00:20:31,980 --> 00:20:35,943
HO, HO, HO!
616
00:20:36,026 --> 00:20:37,069
>> UH, HEY.
617
00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:39,196
SUPER SORRY, ORPHEUS.
618
00:20:39,279 --> 00:20:41,949
WE JUST GOT, YOU KNOW, SWEPT UP
IN THE HALLOWEEN SPIRIT.
619
00:20:42,032 --> 00:20:44,326
>> Dr. Orpheus: THAT IS NOT THE
SPIRIT OF HALLOWEEN.
620
00:20:44,409 --> 00:20:46,995
THIS IS A NIGHT OF TRUE MAGIC.
621
00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:49,998
HALLOWEEN IS THE NIGHT WE
DISCOVER WHO WE ARE.
622
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,793
ARE WE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ZOMBIE
ARMIES?
623
00:20:52,876 --> 00:20:55,003
ARE WE THOSE WHO CONDEMN OTHERS?
624
00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:59,257
OR ARE WE BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN IN
RESPLENDENT COSTUMES COLLECTING
625
00:20:59,341 --> 00:21:00,342
CANDY?
626
00:21:00,425 --> 00:21:02,886
ARE OUR CHOICES IN COSTUMES
PROVOCATIVE?
627
00:21:02,970 --> 00:21:05,097
DO WE DRESS UP AS OUR IDEAL
SELF?
628
00:21:05,180 --> 00:21:08,100
OR ARE WE NOT READY TO DECIDE
WHAT TO BE?
629
00:21:08,183 --> 00:21:09,851
>> DUDE, KNOCK IT OFF!
630
00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:12,229
>> Dr. Orpheus: DO YOU SEE IT
NOW?
631
00:21:12,312 --> 00:21:16,775
WE USE THIS ONE ENCHANTED NIGHT
TO PERFORM THE GREATEST FEAT OF
632
00:21:16,858 --> 00:21:18,193
MAGIC THERE IS.
633
00:21:18,276 --> 00:21:20,904
WE BECOME OURSELVES.
634
00:21:20,988 --> 00:21:24,074
HALLOWEEN IS THE TRUE MAGIC.
635
00:21:24,157 --> 00:21:28,829
IT IS THE NIGHT WE DISCOVER WHO
WE REALLY ARE!
636
00:21:28,912 --> 00:21:30,747
[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]
637
00:21:55,647 --> 00:21:57,858
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
638
00:22:00,068 --> 00:22:00,736
>> Hank: HEY.
639
00:22:00,819 --> 00:22:01,903
I THOUGHT YOU DIED.
640
00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:03,739
>> Dean: WELL, WOULDN'T BE THE
FIRST TIME.
641
00:22:03,822 --> 00:22:05,073
SO, WHERE'S DERMOTT?
642
00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:07,951
>> Hank: HE'S WATCHING THE
"TWILIGHT ZONE" MARATHON WITH
643
00:22:08,035 --> 00:22:08,994
THE GROWN-UPS.
644
00:22:09,077 --> 00:22:10,746
SO, WHAT HAPPENED IN THE POTTER
HOUSE?
645
00:22:10,829 --> 00:22:12,664
>> Dean: I LEARNED SOMETHING.
646
00:22:12,748 --> 00:22:13,749
>> Hank: SOMETHING SCARY?
647
00:22:13,832 --> 00:22:16,543
>> Dean: WELL...
648
00:22:16,626 --> 00:22:17,753
>> Hank: W-WHAT?
649
00:22:17,836 --> 00:22:19,421
>> Dean: I GUESS, UM...
650
00:22:19,504 --> 00:22:20,839
I LEARNED THAT...
651
00:22:20,922 --> 00:22:23,091
BEER TASTES LIKE PEE-PEE.
652
00:22:26,803 --> 00:22:27,804
CHIRP.